Wife, Protect Me! - Chapter 5

Although the final verdict remained unchanged, it allowed Li Nuo to understand the rules of the Law Codex.

His remaining lifespan recorded in the Law Codex could be altered.

For penal servitude alone, within the legal limits, for every year of sentence imposed on a criminal, he could gain one extra day of life.

He had asked the Magistrate of Chang’an: besides penal servitude, Great Xia had lighter punishments like flogging and caning, and heavier ones like exile and death penalty. How much lifespan these punishments could bring him, Li Nuo still didn’t know. Firstly, the female assassin’s conviction had an upper limit, and secondly, he couldn’t keep pestering the honest Magistrate of Chang’an.

However, one thing Li Nuo could confirm:
To increase lifespan through the Law Codex, the criminals must be related to him personally—like the female assassin who attempted to assassinate him. If any random case would work, with the government sentencing so many cases daily, wouldn’t he achieve immortality?

Did this mean the more assassination attempts on him, the better?

To stay alive, he needed others to trade their lives for his…

This was utterly miserable. Who would be so idle as to constantly try assassinating a fool every day?

The Magistrate of Chang’an worried that staying longer would make him unable to resist striking this wastrel. More importantly, he feared dying from anger himself. After cupping his hands toward Li Nuo, he said, “Young master, this official still has cases to judge in the court. Perhaps…”

Mentioning cases sparked an idea in Li Nuo.
He wondered: if a case was unrelated to him but he personally presided over the judgment, could it increase his lifespan?

Time waited for no one. Even though he had just gained two days of life, he only had five days left to live. He must seize every opportunity. At this thought, he immediately said to the Magistrate of Chang’an, “Lord Pei, I have another presumptuous request. Could I judge this case?”

The Magistrate of Chang’an was startled: “What? Young master wants to judge a case?”

Li Nuo asked, “Is it possible?”

Without an official position, judging cases in court was in principle not permitted.
But your father is the Minister of the Court of Revision. Your words become the principle—who would dare object?

The Magistrate of Chang’an took a deep breath and said, “Of course, young master, this way please…”

Steward Wu curiously asked Li Nuo, “Young master, why do you want to judge a case?”

Li Nuo simply smiled and said, “Idle with nothing to do, just judging for fun…”

Steward Wu said nothing more. The young master was likely just indulging a whim, but since he enjoyed it, let him play.

During the trial, when the magistrate hurriedly left, the constables on both sides of the court were curious but didn’t dare speak out. As for the two suspects kneeling below, even with their knees numb, they didn’t dare move recklessly.

After a long while, the magistrate finally returned, accompanied by a lavishly dressed young nobleman.The fifth-rank Magistrate of Chang’an actually yielded the main seat to this young gentleman, treating him with utmost reverence that made everyone present tremble inwardly, even their breathing grew more subdued.

Li Nuo had already learned outside that the Magistrate of Chang’an was handling a theft case, having identified two suspects currently undergoing routine questioning.

Li Nuo first examined the case files. The script of Great Xia resembled traditional Chinese characters from later eras. Having frequently studied ancient documents while writing his thesis, Li Nuo was quite familiar with traditional characters. Though some characters remained unrecognizable, he could infer about eighty to ninety percent from context.

However, his former self was after all a fool who couldn’t even handle arithmetic within ten, likely illiterate for the most part.

Li Nuo handed the files back to the Magistrate of Chang’an, saying, “Lord Pei, I don’t recognize many characters here. Could you kindly read them for me…”

The Magistrate of Chang’an sneered inwardly – illiterate yet pretending to judge cases, momentarily carried away by whims without knowing his own limitations. After these silent criticisms, he smiled and said, “No trouble at all, no trouble. This case is actually quite simple. The Wang family on Chang’an Street lost several dozen taels of silver, suspecting one of two neighbors stole it…”

Soon after, Li Nuo looked down at the courtroom.

This was an ordinary theft case where both of Wang’s neighbors were suspects, yet there was insufficient evidence for conviction.

After pondering briefly, Li Nuo looked toward a thin man with a goatee and asked, “Starting from when you woke up yesterday, recount everything you did in detail, item by item truthfully, omitting nothing.”

The thin man coughed twice and said, “Your Honor, I woke around si hour that morning, first ate three buns and drank congee at a roadside stall, then wandered the streets. At noon I gambled a couple rounds at the casino, ate at Xiangman Tower around wei hour, then went home for a nap. I went out at shen hour, greeted Wang, then visited Fengqi Tower for pleasure… After that, I went to the entertainment quarter for songs, monkey shows, and dancer performances, then drank with friends before returning home before hai hour. I went straight to bed upon returning – I truly had no time to steal anything.”

Li Nuo then turned to the other plump man.

Before he could speak, the man immediately said, “Your Honor, I’m innocent! I woke at mao hour to make pancakes, went out to sell them before chen hour, returned home after selling out by si hour. First I fetched water, then chopped firewood. After these chores, around two ke past noon, I greeted Wang and went home to cook rice… I went out around you hour to buy rice, ate noodles at Liu’s Noodle Shop east of the alley, returned home after buying rice, did laundry, bathed, then had sex with my wife – first missionary, then side, underneath, and finally from behind…”

The Magistrate of Chang’an subtly adjusted his crotch and interrupted, “Enough, no need for such detailed descriptions…”

The Wang household had suffered theft, losing several dozen taels of silver, with suspicion falling on one of two neighbors. Both had been summoned to court but denied the theft, each providing alibis.Dozens of taels of silver were no small sum for ordinary commoners. As their parent-official, he naturally had to take it seriously, but he couldn’t be bothered to investigate every detail himself. Since this pampered young master wanted to handle the case, he let him have his way.

He wanted to see if this spoiled youth had any of his father’s capabilities.

After listening to both testimonies, Li Nuo didn’t comment immediately. Instead, he casually chatted with the Magistrate of Chang’an, smiling as he asked: “Where is Lord Pei’s hometown?”

The Magistrate was taken aback before replying: “Longnan.”

“What a coincidence…”

“You’re from Longnan too? Aren’t you from Chang’an?”

“I have a friend whose ancestral home is in Longnan… By the way, how many people are in Lord Pei’s household?”

“I have an elderly mother, and my humble wife and I have one son.”

“A handsome and talented man like Lord Pei has no concubines at home?”

“Ah, this official would like to, but my wife won’t permit it…”
…

Their conversation drifted aimlessly, as if they had completely forgotten about the trial. Not only were the bailiffs on both sides captivated, even the two suspects below were listening to the gossip with great interest.

Just as the Magistrate was wondering what scheme this pampered youth was brewing, Li Nuo suddenly turned to the people below and shifted the topic, saying to the fat man: “You, describe what you did that day in reverse order.”

Though confused, the fat man obediently recalled and stated: “This humble one pleasured with his wife, using rear position, lower position, side position, upper position. Before that, took a bath, washed clothes, bought rice, ate noodles at Liu’s Noodle Shop… cooked rice, chopped firewood, fetched water, sold pancakes, made pancakes, got up…”

Li Nuo nodded slightly.

Though slower than before, each event matched up with his previous account.

Then his gaze turned to the thin man with the goatee: “Your turn.”

The thin man stammered: “This humble one got up at si hour…”

Li Nuo waved to interrupt him: “Not forward. Start from going to bed at night and work backwards…”

Sweat began beading on the thin man’s forehead: “Slept, drank with friends before bed, watched monkey shows at the pleasure house, dancing girls, listened to music…”

Li Nuo waved again: “Wait, didn’t you say earlier it was listening to music first, then monkey shows, finally dancing girls? Why is it mixed up now…”

The goateed man trembled, sweat pouring down his back, and stammered: “R-remembered wrong…”

“Continue.”

“Yes, listened to music, listened to music, napped at home before listening to music…”

“Weren’t you having fun at Fengqi Tower?”

“Oh oh, forgot, forgot, napped first then went to Fengqi Tower…”

“Before napping?”

“Ate at… at Xiangman Tower, gambled at the casino, before that wandered around, wandered around, ate three buns and a bowl of porridge before wandering…”

“Didn’t you say two buns earlier?”

“Two, two.”

“My apologies, I just remembered – you did say three earlier.”

Smack!

As if returning to court, Li Nuo slammed the court gavel and angrily declared: “He remembers clearly how many positions he used with his wife and in what order, yet you can’t remember whether you ate two or three buns this morning! Your previous testimony must be fabricated. Speak! Why are you lying? Did you steal Mrs. Wang’s silver?”

The goateed man jumped in fright and immediately replied: “Your Honor, this humble one has poor memory…”

By this time, the experienced Magistrate of Chang’an had already understood everything.

“Poor memory, you say…”Before Li Nuo could ask further, the Magistrate of Chang’an revealed a smile and waved to the constables on either side, saying, “Go, take him away and let him think carefully. I believe he will remember…”

He was unwilling to use torture because he did not wish to inflict it on the innocent. But now, anyone who wasn’t blind could see that the skinny man with the goatee was suspicious. At this point, it was necessary to help him restore his memory properly.

In truth, he had already found this fellow quite irritating earlier.
Fengqi Pavilion… What status or position do you have to dare visit the same brothel as this official?

Upon hearing the Magistrate of Chang’an’s words, the skinny man with the goatee trembled. Even if he hadn’t experienced the county yamen’s “great memory restoration technique” himself, he had heard about it from his peers. It was truly a state where one could neither live nor die. He immediately pleaded, “Your Honor, I confess! I stole the silver. There’s no need to trouble these officers!”

…

“Court dismissed!”

After striking the court gavel, the Magistrate of Chang’an cupped his hands toward Li Nuo and said, “Young master, your wisdom and strategy are beyond what this humble official can match. How did you come up with the idea of having them recount their testimonies in reverse?”

Li Nuo smiled and replied, “It’s nothing special. If someone has personally experienced an event, even when recalling it in reverse, they generally won’t make major mistakes. But if it’s a story fabricated on the spot, it’s difficult to retell it backward. Moreover, during this time, he was distracted by our conversation, making it even harder for him to remember…”

This was just a small technique from modern interrogation methods. Although Li Nuo wasn’t a criminal police officer, he often interacted with them and had picked up a few tricks.

The Magistrate of Chang’an cupped his hands again. “This humble official has learned much…”

As he spoke, he couldn’t help but take a few more glances at the young man before him.

Rumors truly couldn’t be trusted.
Who said the son of the Minister of the Court of Revision was a fool?
If this was a fool, then wouldn’t he, Pei Zhe, be even worse than a fool?

Outside the courtroom, Steward Wu, though astonished, sighed with emotion. Since when could the word “wisdom” be used to describe their own foolish young master…